Divorce Sucks

Here I am. It's not pretty. Among many other interests, I've decided to blog about my divorce and all of the parts that SUCK or ROCK, whichever perspective I might chose on any given day. Yes, "suck" seems like such a poor word choice and yet nothing fits quite so perfectly. Divorce SUCKS your finances. Divorce SUCKS your time. Divorce SUCKS your energy. Divorce SUCKS your emotions. Divorce SUCKS the happy out of life. Divorce is not for the weak of heart or mind. Therefore, as hard as I look and search through my mind and an online thesaurus (which will not accept the connotation for suck that I would like) for a word that would better fit the description, I just can't seem to find one that will accurately describe my experience as well as the word SUCK and all of its pop-culture, modern meanings. And yet, as horribly suckish as divorce is, over 50% of all American marriages are ending in divorce according to the Census Bureau. I can't help but question why so many of us chose to end our marriages, tear apart all that we have created together, separate all of our belongings and friends, hurt our children, become community outcasts and suffer the emotional suck that comes with a divorce? I truly can't even begin to comprehend the madness of the world, but I have some of my own understandings and I hope to answer many of these questions for myself someday. I'm always one who finds importance in delving into her own madness. I'm on a mission to dig through the muck of my emotions and somehow come out better; if that's possible. I think at times it will be hard to be honest with myself, especially when the topic is painful, and lets be real, divorce is painful, no matter who instigates the actual process, but I am here and I am on a mission. Divorce sucks, but I'm still breathing. I don't want to give up on the possibility of a beautiful life waiting for me. I will muck through this suck.